Barney Miller
Barney Miller is the kind of cop we'd all like to run into. Always sensible, he maintains order over a band of detectives who gamble, hit on anything in skirts, go to renaissance philosophy conventions for fun, and would really prefer to be writing. Nearly all of the action takes place in the squad room where citizens and criminals are brought in to complicate the mix.
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Episodes
1. Goodbye, Mr. Fish (1)
A neighborhood vigilante group runs amok, and Fish is AWOL on the day of his retirement.
2. Goodbye, Mr. Fish (2)
Fish finally shows up for work, but refuses to acknowledge his mandatory retirement.
3. Bugs
Listening devices discovered in the squad room may have come from Internal Affairs - or the Nixon administration!
4. Corporation
A quixotic environmentalist faces the high-priced lawyer hired by the chemical plant he's been assaulting.
5. Burial
Retired Sergeant Fish returns to assist Barney in locating a pilfered corpse.
6. Copy Cat
Yemana scours the TV Guide to try to second-guess the felon who's aping the prime-time lineup crime shows; a drunk forgets the most important element in a hold-up - a weapon.
7. Blizzard
A blizzard holes up the 12th with an unwelcome guest—a corpse; a self-proclaimed prophet is sure that the weather is indicative of a new ice age.
8. Chase
A taxi company is irate when Wojo totals a borrowed cab while pursuing a robbery suspect; Lieutenant Scanlon tries to ferret out 12th Precinct corruption with a drug pusher.
9. Thanksgiving Story
The detectives clean up after three mental patients sit down to Thanksgiving dinner at an automat.
10. Tunnel
Wojo is buried alive after a tunnel collapses on a burglar burrowing towards the diamond exchange; a homeless Harris is combing Manhattan for a new apartment.
11. Atomic Bomb
Neither the bomb squad nor the government recognizes a college student's physics project as a functional atomic bomb - but Detective Dietrich does.
12. The Bank
A man charges a sperm bank with murder after the lab unwittingly destroys the man's last sample.
13. The Ghost
The detectives are unimpressed with a man who claims he's being visited by a poltergeist - that is, until they lock the man up and strange events begin occurring about the squad room.
14. Appendicitis
Yemana is hospitalized with appendicitis; the cage is a stopping-off place for a sugar addict and an aging bounty hunter.
15. Rape
The city legalizes off-track gambling, to the delight of Yemana; a woman wants her husband arrested on a rape charge; a master of disguise perpetuates a crime spree.
16. Eviction (1)
Barney puts his career on the line by refusing to forcibly evict the tenants of a condemned hotel, while Lugar tries to figure out what to do with his vacation time.
17. Eviction (2)
The hotel situation now involves a SWAT team, while Dietrich learns the identity of his amnesic ""girlfriend.""
18. Wojo's Problem
Wojo comes to Barney with a problem his superior would rather not know about; the 12th's new female detective has a very jealous husband, suspicious of her all-male co-workers; somehow a shoplifter escapes - in a wheelchair.
19. 'Quo Vadis?'
Barney uncovers, if you will, the real reason behind a woman's vehement insistence that a nude-painting exhibit at a local art gallery be shut down; the Millers may be heading for divorce.
20. Hostage
Harris finally finds an apartment in the Village; a ventriloquist insists he's not responsible for his dummy's insensitive remarks; a prisoner holds the boys at gunpoint.
21. Evaluation
The members of the squad nervously await Barney filling out their evaluation forms. Meanwhile, Harris arrests a numerologist who will only give his name as ""1223,"" and a porno shop reporting vandalism turns out to be a mom and pop operation being hassled by their kids.
22. The Sighting
A man liquidates all of his assets into gold, much to his wife's dismay; Wojo claims he saw a UFO over Staten Island.
23. Inauguration
Harris does some extensive soul searching when he's offered a job on the mayor's security team.
Episodes
